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Awkward Songs To Lose Your Virginity To

Note to the new breed: before you get all Casanova on your woman, I’d recommend reading this article so you don’t make a fatal mistake when choosing songs to listen to while boning. It’s a slippery slope, and you’ll be lucky to make it out alive if you don’t follow the following advice.

Whether it’s a virginity mixtape or music to live your life by, we’ve posted plenty of things about the best songs to accompany life’s big moments. But today we thought we’d go a different direction, and warn you about what NOT to listen to while you’re having sex. Specifically, here’s a list of the 10 Most Awkward Songs To Lose Your Virginity To.

10. “Stairway To Heaven” by Led Zeppelin
“Stairway to Heaven” is an amazing song and a great song to have sex to under normal circumstances. However, your first time ever having sex isn’t normal circumstances and it will be tough enough for you to last long enough to make it through a regular song, let alone a 10-minute epic like this Zeppelin classic. And nothing’s more awkward than “finishing” before the song you’re listening to…not that we’d know anything about that of course.



9. “Mama Said There’d Be Days Like This” by The Shirelles
This classic song is catchy, soulful, and will stick in your head all day. However, it’s also about your mother predicting life events which is probably not a great thing to have in your head as you’re losing your virginity.

8. “Hey Mickey” by Toni Basil
The only time you should be listening to this 1980’s staple is if there’s some kind of cheerleader role playing involved. But we’re guessing there’s not a lot of role playing involved in your first time and all the clapping in this song is probably just going to distract you from the matter at hand.

Read the rest of the list at Whip It Out Comedy.