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Cracked List: The 12 Most God-Awful Tribute Albums Ever Recorded

You know you’re heading into a disaster when Cracked‘s list of The 12 Most God-Awful Tribute Albums Ever Recorded features artists that are shameless tribute acts of much better bands to begin with. You know the exceptions.

It’s not easy to write your own music. So why not do the next best thing, and make a whole album consisting of popular songs from another band? And while you’re at it, why not completely change the songs so that absolutely nothing that was good about them remains? And while you’re at that, why not just run around the streets throwing your own feces at people?

Welcome to the world of the tribute album, where bad musicians pay homage to their favorite music. By destroying it. For example…

#12. Pickin’ on Creed: A Bluegrass Tribute

It’s no small task to make Creed’s music even more hate worthy, but this is a step in the right direction. When it comes to bluegrass music, there’s a fine line between O Brother Where Art Thou and Deliverance.

Unfortunately, the tunes on this tribute lean heavily toward the latter. In other words, listening to this tribute album is like having your ear drums raped in the woods by Scott Stapp. Probably.

Best Line From the Album Description:

“The songs are still the same, just stripped of their power and muscle and presented from a different, more organic perspective.”

#11. Smooth Sax Tribute to Norah Jones

If you’re anything like us, you probably find the adult-oriented pop stylings of Norah Jones a little too aggressive for your delicate sensibilities. Thankfully, this tribute album addresses that issue by turning the excitement down well past zero. The backing tracks are mostly unchanged, but Jones’s snore inducing vocals are replaced by the most heart-pounding tenor saxophone playing this side of Kenny G. Just thinking about it is enough to make us want a nap.

Best Line From the Album Description:

We couldn’t find an album description. We’re assuming whoever was in charge of writing one fell asleep while listening to this shit.

They don’t call her Norah the Snorer for nothing.

#10. The Beatle Barkers

The fatal mistake most tribute albums make is failing to understand the difference between paying tribute and shitting on a band’s good name for profit. If this album was a house inadvertently built on the grave of Ringo Starr, he would poltergeist the shit out of it until it imploded and disappeared into a flash of light (Ringo’s dead, right?).

This album answers the unasked question: “What would timeless Beatles tunes sound like with the vocals replaced by barking dogs, wailing cats and motherfucking cows?” and most likely caters to that previously untapped “I hate myself and want all of my friends to abandon me” demographic.

Whoever came up with this idea is probably still alive and well, yet John Lennon gets shot in the back. What a crock of horseshit that is.

Best Line From the Album Description:

“Who knew cows had such good taste?”

Read the rest of the list at Cracked.