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Old Man Says Paying For Sex is Tax Deductible

I wanna be able to write off a bunch of things, like the gas I put in my enormous SUV, and take long drives just so I can hear the rest of that new Metallica album that just came out. Or how about all the lap dances and booze I’ve paid for in the past. If this old geezer is trying it, I might as well.

It’s only our given rights as Americans to try and get away with as much as possible. Screw it, Hookers for everyone!

From Holytaco:

Aside from urinating all over yourself and looking like a raisin, getting old looks like it can be a lot of fun. Old men think the world owes them everything because they’ve been on this earth for more than 60 years, so they do whatever they want. Even if it means writing off sex toys. According to the nypost:

William Halby, a 77-year-old Brooklyn lawyer, owes tens of thousands of dollars in back taxes for wrongly deducting more than $300,000 in prostitutes, porn, sex toys and erotic massages, a state tax judge ruled yesterday. The ruling came despite the meticulous efforts of Halby – a tax lawyer – to prove the deductions were reasonable medical expenses in his effort to fight depression and erectile dysfunction brought on by age.

“I was depressed,” Halby, who’s divorced, semi-retired and living alone in a Bay Ridge apartment, told The Post yesterday. “I live a solitary life. I have no social life. I needed that release.”

Halby said he found his “sex surrogates” – preferably brunettes – through ads in The Village Voice and sometimes visited them several times a week. “Over the years, I’ve been with dozens of girls for full-body massage with . . . happy ending,” he said.

All told, Halby spent about $322,000 to satisfy his desires, according to court papers.